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This Dark Misery Love

there was once a time, when I moved through the world
like a sleeper whose mind was filled with constant dreams,
fairy tale lands, happy endings, and a sun that never set.

then, came the awakening, like that of ice water upon skin
that burns hot with fever, and my eyes flew open and have since
never shut. the constant dreams came to an end and, instead
of the bright, shining light of my make belief world,
there’s darkness about my soul, a dark misery caused by love,
or is rather the harsh consequence of love.

o why, dear love, did this rude awakening have to come about
so soon? o why, dear love, have you gone? the stench of
my misery overwhelms my senses, and the walls reverberate
with emptiness, echoing loudly my loneliness. all that is left
is the pain, such pain, such pain! it floods the chambers of
my heart and constricts my lungs ‘til I can hardly breathe,
and the fear.

I fear I am inept at that thing called love. and, so fearing,
I embrace the dark misery, the despair; yet, even as I do so,
I feel hope stirring as time inexorably moves forward
and the promise of new love brightens the distant horizon.

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